Memories of a young refugee

 

 

I am 15 years old; I am leaving Tunisia with my father on a refugee boat…

Big difference with my travels before when with the entire family we were going to Paris to spend 3- or 4-weeks’ vacation in the summer and visiting family.…

This time we are on the deck, spending the night on a folding chair, my dear papa asks me every 5 minutes if I need something… I do not need anything  I just do not understand what we are doing, and he answers:

-We are going to try to make a new life in France, we had to leave Tunisia…

-In France ? Where ? 

-You are going to Montpellier, to Lycée Joffre , it is a public boarding school, a free school, you will spend the year there, I will go to Paris and try to start a new life for all of us,

-What about my mother and my brother?

-They are staying in Tunis for the moment, they will come to us later

-So what will I do in that school?

-Study, be the best,  and think about your life, imagine what you want to be, to do, tell yourself what life will be for you.

-But papa, I do not know really, the only thing I know is that I want to be somebody else.

-Yes you do know, you are special, you had so many years to be yourself, just be you, be demanding, listen to people, learn from everyone, be special.

-But papa, what can I do in this school? I do not know anybody , I am not French, I do not know what I really am, a Tunisian Jew? Is that a possible French?

- You are not a French citizen, but you are French, you were raised as a French boy, at home we were French, we love France, we love French people.   Remember You are special, you finish the French school before anybody, you are ready for everything, you are strong, you are a great boy, you know more about everything than anybody we know.

-But papa, I do not know the French boys, how will they see me? Do you think they will accept me?

-Do not worry, just be yourself, you will win, like you always did.

-Ok Papa, I will try, and I will make you proud of me, I have always desired to make you proud…

- I am proud of you, you are an incredible learner and arrived at the last year of school before anybody, next year you already be at the university.

- Yes papa, next year is the university, I will be 16… It is time… And you papa, what will you do in Paris, alone, and nowhere to go, and no money at all….

- Do not worry about me, I am staying in a small hotel Rue Champollion, the room is paid by your uncle, and I will start a new business, I know a lot of people in Paris, and many trust me.

- Ok papa, be sure to give me news…from time to time…I be very alone there… and when will we have news from my brother and my mother?

- They will write to you, I am sure…

 

 

We arrived in Marseille after a very difficult night on the deck of the boat, and we took a train to Montpellier, the city where I will spend the year in the Public Boarding school….

Lycée Joffre was beautiful, in the center of the city… We walked for more than an hour, my valise was heavy, full of my memories as a child, soon I will have to throw all of it…                                                                     To arrive at the entrance gate we had to go through a plaza called PLACE DE L’OEUF, on one side of the plaza a little café called YA BON meaning IT IS GOOD and on the other side of the plaza another café called YA MIEUX meaning IT IS BETTER… That was a great start in my year in France, in Montpellier….

I will pass on my introduction to the gentleman in charge of meeting me, I said goodbye to my father, he left with tears all over his face and said: “ I am not worried about you, I know you will be fine.” I will always remember these words , he repeated the same words five years later when he died in a hospital in Paris, heart broken by the death of my brother in a car accident, he was 59 years old….

 

The superintendent showed me the school. The classrooms and the refectory, we were walking in the hallways and in the courts, walking in the middle of young guys running, laughing,  talking fast… They all looked ok… I asked myself: Will I make some friends? Will I be accepted, will they like me, what should I say to them.  In my class they will be older than me, I wonder if they will make fun of me!!!!!!

Then the superintendent brought me to the dormitory…. He showed me a closet and said: “ This is yours for your stuff, here is the key… Then he showed me a bunk bed …

- Your bed is in the top, you have another student on the bottom bed, always go first on the top…

- Who is in the bottom bed?

-I do not remember his name, but he is also in your class…

 

I had never slept in bunk bed, images of my bedroom from Tunis were invading me, with a balcony, a very large room , where I had all my toys, my memories and more recently all my books.. All this was gone, was taken away from me, now I had a small bed and a metal closet, and I was alone in a foreign country, yes the country of my culture, but still foreign… I started to tremble, while emptying my valise, wondering about life, wondering about my lost family, wondering about my next step of survival, I was 15 years old…. But I had survived many difficult times before, I will do it again, I will….

I survived all year in this Lycée, doing the homework of others for a few francs. Writing sometimes 6 or 7 dissertations for the students around me , even if they were not in my class… My surname was: the useful guy……

Once a Saturday afternoon, one of the students said to me:

- Bernard you never go out from the Lycée, I am going this afternoon to a surprise- party, we will dance and meet girls, do you want to come, you will have a good time.

- Really you want me to join you ?

Nobody never had asked me to join a group for a good time.

-Yes, it is time for you to be a real French boy by meeting everybody in a dancing group.

-Ok, I will go with you, do I have to wear something special.

- Just wear what you think is fancy….

 

We arrived at the place of the surprise party, many people were dancing the TWIST, laughing and screaming and being young… I looked at all this and smiled, maybe I should also dance the twist and be happy for a few minutes… A girl came to me and said: You want to dance with me? I looked at her, she was so beautiful and smiling and happy…

-I never danced before, I will not know…

-Give me your hands , I will teach you…

She took my hands and guide me in the center of the room, first time for me to dance and be with young people….

She hold my hands, a girl holding my hands, I was so happy, I was almost smiling of joy…Then she said:

-What is your name

- Bernard

- Are you in the lycée?

- Yes , I am.

- Where are you from?

- I am from Tunis in Tunisia.-

- What?

-From Tunis.

-Ah, ok, have a good time.

She left.

I was in the middle of the room, with people dancing the Twist around me, I was alone, but I decided not to stop, and I continued dancing by myself, thinking, too bad for you…..

 

A lesson that I kept all my life: IN LIFE GO ON WITH YOUR DREAMS EVEN IF PEOPLE AROUND YOU DENY YOU ALL POSSIBILITIES….. YOU WILL WIN AT THE END, JUST BECAUSE YOU WENT ON, AND LEARNED SO MUCH FROM IT….